Wednesday, April 12, 2006

女人,你不应该做弱者

这个标题很有文革的味道。这篇文章的内容也是如此。最近看到的好多事情让我想说几句话。

美女林青霞加入豪门,50多岁了,还要披挂上阵试图再度怀孕生子才能保证在家庭中的地位。叹叹叹!多么大的美女也罢,多么风光也罢,当年如何追来的也罢,归根到底,没有儿子,仍是罪过。我不禁觉得思维模糊,我们现在生活的,究竟是什么年代?

常去的华人论坛,有人抱怨,想做家庭主妇男朋友不肯养。有人跳出来愤愤地说:男人养女人天经地义!也有人做幸福状,我劳工讲,我不想做就不做,回家来他会养我耶~别人的家庭琐事不归我管,而且顶风做恶人,不免会惹一身骚。不管,有些话不吐不快。

我不明白为什么这么多姐妹,仍有这种等靠思想。靠劳工生活,很值得羡慕吗?有人说,家庭主妇是年薪6万块的工作,且不说这个信息的准确性(专业女佣才多少钱一个月?),这个6万年薪的工作,那么牢靠吗?假如被lay off,这个“工作经验”,可是不会为找下家增分。又有人说,只要劳工好,这个希望,难道不是太过缥缈了吗?本来面前有广阔天地,非要自己把幸福生活的希望维系在一根系风筝的棉线上,难道心里不会有岌岌可危的压力感?

男人养女人天经地义,这句话会让男人不爽,我也不爽得很。凭什么?吃人手短,拿人手软。你若要别人养活,就要有相应的东西来交换,比如,年轻美貌。等到点灯熬油的人老珠黄以后,再交出的,恐怕就是家里的话语权,经济权,支配权。

我常常觉得惊讶的是很多女人对自我的模糊,比如:“想做教授太太”,比如,“希望劳工有钱”,比如“做得好不如嫁的好”。且不说这种想法对劳工的压力。自己想要什么,自己挣不行吗?嫁入豪门,看似风光,有口说不出的委屈也很多。连林姐姐都有心重新出山,瘦身接戏,自给自足。

的确,自己挣自己吃会辛苦,但是拿到手中的钱便也踏实。而且,不必给子宫太大压力。

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

我不明白为什么这么多姐妹,仍有这种等靠思想。
----Let me tell you why: because the whole world want them to think like that. Including your parents, friends, education, media. Believe it or not, the world belongs to man, not woman. We condition you to become sex slaves.
For example, take a look of hollywood movies. The relationship between woman and man were defined by power and money, and sugar-coated with things we want you to believe, such as love, care, tenderness and values, personailities...

Anonymous said...

Let's put it into a more revolution term: Gender Liberation.

This liberation war has started centuries ago, and still going on. It would never claim success; unless majority of Women believe what we are fighting is true.

This is a war, not between men and women. Rather, it is a war between 2 groups of women: women and sub-men.

Sub-men, they are the women who believe men are better than women; women are and should be dependents of men.

Women, this enlighten group, are self-confident, independent both physically and mentally. They respect themselves, and they demand respect from others. In return, they probably have the respect from men, but not from sub-men.

Sub-men, deep down, they do not have their own self-respect. In return, they do not deserve other's respect, either.

To win this war of gender liberation, all women, you have to have self-respect, self-recognition. A revolution won't be succeeding unless it's spontaneous. Yes, you have to want it yourself. You have to believe it yourself.

No matter how strong the electrical field would be, a wooden pole would never be magnetized. The inner force and energy has much more power than the outer opponent.

You are a human being, not a rib from any man, not a sub-man. However, until you believe it yourself, you are serving the other side to seal the truth against yourself. Until you respect yourself, you would never receive and demand respect from others.

Anonymous said...

Oh you are as aggressive as before. I don't mind working around the clock to make a living; I don't mind marrying someone and staying home as a housewife either. Why "housewife" is a signal of being weak -- just a matter of choice.

Honestly our culture does put much more expectation to males -- you seldom see househusband, for example. But isn't that an advantage to us? At least we get one more option if we want to.

Anonymous said...

mm is a little... MEAN!这最后一句话太不HD了。这么mean的女人,不当也罢。hehe

Anonymous said...

Actually as a female and phD candidate, sometimes I do want to be a housewife to get rid of pressure of research and making a living(but I can't sine I don't even have a bf ). But I just enjoy the freedom to exploring my value which is subject to my standard.

Girls who want to be housewife are lucky if they can get their husband to support her, we are also lucky to have chances to expolre our interests for the world. If everyone get what they want, that's good. Many males don't even have this choice, how poor they are.

You choose your life style for which you sacrifice something. Maybe you don't think that's a sacrifice, which for somebody else it is a big deal. As you know, people are different, girls are different. So You can encourage more women to contribute to science or other field, but also leave those girls to lead a life they want to. happiness has different definition for different people.

To my heart, I want to be a creative female, which decides my role is not going to be just a housewife, but I am very willing to be a home artist!